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Rocker must realize he's not a victim


Special to ESPN.com

January 18

Take a right at the Krispy Kreme, cross the Otis Redding Bridge, go up the hill and the history of Macon unfolds, its rambling antebellum homes still intact since Sherman never reached this part of Georgia. It seems there is a church on every corner as religion is an important part of community life in Macon.

This is where John Rocker comes from. His parents, Jake and Judy, are well-educated, religious, hard-working. Jake is a lawyer and executive at Georgia Farm Bureau Insurance; Judy is a former teacher who currently runs a consulting company out of her house. Everyone you talk to in Macon will tell you Jake Rocker is one of the pillars of the community. "I've never met John," says Mariners general manager Pat Gillick, "but for years I've heard that Jake Rocker is an outstanding man, really something."

Where Rocker comes from is not the town the 1974 movie "Macon County Line" portrayed, as so many in the national media have stereotyped. It is a town of one large, rambling house after another. Downtown, where you'll find the "In Memory of Elizabeth Reed" storefront, is Duane Allman's country. John Rocker grew up here, out on the north side of Macon.

But John Rocker has to look in the mirror and worry about himself. He feels betrayed by the original story, but he cannot allow himself to even think about taking the role of victim.

Rocker's life-long best friend, Ched Smaha, is the son of first-generation Lebanese immigrants. "My father came through Ellis Island," says Ched's mother Kelly, whose husband Charlie is an orthodontist. "I have known John for 18 years. He's been in my house thousands of times. He's eaten at my kitchen table, eaten my food. I believe in him. I know him. What people don't realize is that John is very smart. He is close to brilliant." Ched is also smart; he is currently in dental school.

Rocker's high school teacher, coach and friend is Jim Turner, a quiet former Triple-A infielder, a man of deep faith and respect. "John was a 3.5 student with the kind of college boards (1270 on his SAT) that would have gotten him into any university," Turner says. "We remained close all these years, and I know him very well. He is not a racist, he is not a bigot."

Bruce Chen, a native of Panama whose grandfather moved from China to help engineer the building of the Panama Canal, defended his minor league teammate this past week. "When I first signed and was in the minor leagues, John Rocker was the one player who would give me and Winston Abreu rides everywhere," Chen said. "He always made sure we had what we needed. Then in 1998, when I needed to go to Leo's camp (a pre-spring training camp run by pitching coach Leo Mazzone), John invited me to come stay at his house in Macon. He also took in Odalis Perez. His parents fed us and took care of us. Never, in all the years that I knew him in the minor leagues, did anything come up about my nationality."

When Rocker played at home for Class A Macon in 1995 and 1996, Australian Glenn Williams lived with him and his family. "When Glenn was operated on, all these miles from home," says Chen, "Judy Rocker was at his side in the hospital." The first day of the '96 season, Rocker called home and told his mother that in addition to Williams, he was bringing a young friend named Andruw Jones to live with them. When all the controversy initially erupted over his tirade in Sports Illustrated, two of the four players Rocker first talked to were Brian Hunter and Rudy Seanez. Then, after Chen volunteered to come to his defense, Rocker spent two days last week with Jones and George Lombard.

"I know you," Jones told Rocker. "But you've got to control yourself."

"When I heard about it, I thought, 'That's John going crazy," said Lombard, the son of a civil rights worker and grandson of a Harvard Business School dean. Lombard, who is black, told Rocker, "Come on. Be careful from now on."

Jay Leno has had guests take baseball bats and whack a John Rocker dummy. Saturday Night Live did a skit that included someone saying, "I'm John Rocker and I'm a racist. ... I'm John Rocker's father and I'm a racist."

"Jake was deeply hurt," says Charlie Smaha. "Here's a man who is anything but a racist, a man who has more than half the men he works with African-American. Jake said he had one thing to cling to -- the fact that they know him and the people on Saturday Night Live do not."

When Jake and Judy were advised not to go to New York to see their only son pitch in the World Series because of concerns for their safety, Rocker called Turner from Yankee Stadium during Game 3 and told him he had tickets for him. "It was really tough on him in New York," says Turner. "But John is very sensitive. He takes everything personally. He especially took all that in New York personally."

Rocker says, "When I got upset, I didn't differentiate between the people spitting on me and hitting me in the head with D batteries in Shea Stadium or Yankee Stadium and the people of New York. That was wrong. Stupid."

When John Rocker imploded with a reporter's cassette recorder running it was not a simple, one-dimensional, talk radio, black-and-white storyline. "I care about John, I like John a lot and I will stand by him as long as he lives," Turner says. "But I worry about him. He was quoted last season as saying he thinks he'll burn out early and die young. That scares me."

What Rocker said was unforgiveable. But the fact is, every team has heard similar diatribes those from small towns across America have about New York City. One of the game's best pitchers, a sophisticated, intellectual graduate of one of the world's finest universities, has splattered teammates with similar comments and boasts that he will never play without a no-trade clause to the two New York teams. "Maybe I'm too conscious of how rude people are," Rocker says. "I come from an environment where people say 'thank you' and are civil and respectful. Why do their fans have to scream obscenities, spit ... they don't do that anywhere else."

Is Rocker wrong? Of course not. Commissioner Bud Selig and New York Mayor Rudy Giuliani should worry about crowd behavior. Selig should worry less about luxury boxes and more about protecting kids from obscene grossness and ballpark violence.

But John Rocker has to look in the mirror and worry about himself. He feels betrayed by the original story, but he cannot allow himself to even think about taking the role of victim. He cannot listen to those who agree with him, and a lot of those 18-to-45, white, male, homophobic talk-radio listeners do agree; those are people Rocker cannot associate with, much less become the poster boy for. Rocker needs to call every teammate and begin reparations with veteran players like Tom Glavine, many of whom he offended with his shots about the clubhouse.

What happened when John Rocker imploded was not some guy drawing swastikas on a wall. Understand him. He was a hyperactive child, who despite his hyperactivity was a top student and the best athlete at Presbyterian Day High School in Macon. He is a Type A personality and, in his own words, "anal to the point of being manic." He is cocky to the point of rubbing some older teammates as borderline arrogant. He takes things personally. And he has an anger in him that worries everyone in Macon who knows and cares for him.

Mix the hyperactivity and the Type A personality, put him in traffic with a messed-up schedule, and he imploded in road rage at the moment when he was discussing New York.

While some call for his banishment, Players Association head Don Fehr, who now understands where some of all this came from, and Rocker's agents, Randy and Alan Hendricks and Joe Sambito, are trying to get together with Jake Rocker and Jim Turner and friends to help Rocker eliminate the temper and the simmering anger.

Rocker denies that returning to New York won't be that tough. He's wrong, dead wrong. He won't be able to go anywhere in the city without being taunted, jeered, cursed and spat upon. He's already shown strains when dealing with blown saves; every great closer has a time when they'll blow three in a week, and he's got to be as even-tempered as Mariano Rivera when it does happen.

John Rocker is not evil. He is, as he stated, "complex," and he needs to address what caused him to lash out after a blown save against the Mets in the playoffs and what happened in his car with that tape recorder rolling. The Braves never addressed the hot wires of his personality, but Fehr and the Hendricks brothers will. And hopefully, John Rocker will move on with his life and career and be the man people in Macon know he is -- Jake Rocker's boy.

Arms race in AL West
Thus, Texas GM Doug Melvin reconsidered and signed Darren Oliver to a three-year, $19 million contract (of which $6M is deferred) to go with Kenny Rogers. What Melvin hasn't tipped is whether or not the Rangers are concerned about Justin Thompson, who likely won't open the season in the rotation after offseason surgery. Melvin indicates Thompson is progressing on schedule and he now has three veteran left-handers in the rotation in a ballpark that favors left-handers in a league that is predominatly right-handed. It means Texas has the weapons to combat Oakland's powerful left-handed lineup, not to mention Seattle with John Olerud and, for the time being, Ken Griffey.

The A's may be top-heavy in right-handed starting pitching and left-handed hitting, but they won 87 games last year and now have Tim Hudson, Kevin Appier and Olivares for an entire season. "What makes the A's such a wild card in this race is that they have so much young talent," says one GM. The A's anticipate that former Boston reliever Ron Mahay will grab the fifth spot in the rotation, but in Triple-A they have left-handed starters Mark Mulder and Barry Zito, their last two No. 1 draft picks.

Ariel Prieto is recovering from surgery and throwing 92-95 mph in Puerto Rico; several teams, including the Indians, are trying to deal for Prieto right now. Reliever Luis Vizcaino is averaging nearly 12 strikeouts per nine innings in the Dominican, and they have two more outstanding relief prospects in Chad Harville and Bert Snow. "The A's and Marlins are the teams with the most prospects we rank as sure things," says one NL executive. "Hudson, Mulder, Zito, Harville, (RHP Jesus) Colome, (OF Mario) Encarnacion. ... They're loaded more than any club in the American League, by far."

But look at one organization's ranking of the best left-handed pitching prospects in the game:

Starters                      Relievers
1. Rick Ankiel, St. Louis     1. Armando Almanza, Florida
2. Ryan Anderson, Seattle     2. J.C. Romero, Minnesota
3. Ed Yarnall, Yankees        3. B.J. Ryan, Baltimore
4. Mark Mulder, Oakland       4. Jeff Williams, L.A.
5. Matt Riley, Baltimore      5. Brent Billingsley, Florida
6. Wilfredo Rodriguez, Hou.
7. Barry Zito, Oakland
8. Ted Lilly, Montreal
9. Nick Bierbrodt, Arizona
10. Corey Lee, Texas

Four of the top 10 are in the AL West, and that's without addressing Mahay or the Rangers' Matt Perisho, who won 15 games in Triple-A and will open the season in the bullpen or as the fifth starter should Thompson not be ready for a couple of months.

Cardinals flying higher in '00?

  • There is little question that one of the most improved teams should be St. Louis. Fernando Vina gives them a much-needed leadoff hitter and a player with a definite edge to his game. They anticipate that, if healthy, Ray Lankford and Eli Marrero will have far better seasons, and that J.D. Drew will improve, especially now that he appreciates how difficult the game is to play every day.

    Most important, if Darryl Kile bounces back, with Andy Benes and Kent Bottenfield around to allow Rick Ankiel to slide into the fifth spot, the Cards have the kind of veteran starters Tony La Russa prefers.

    They're also very encouraged by the work of Matt Morris, who bought a house in Jupiter, Fla. and has been throwing well and is on schedule to be ready by May 1. Then there's the hope that Alan Benes will be back in midseason. Morris and Alan Benes were two of the few legitimate No. 1 starter prospects in the game when each went down

    News, notes and rumors

  • The Reds now think there's a very good possibility that Deion Sanders will come to spring training and attempt a comeback, which they believe he can pull off. Sanders wants to see how he plays after two years of inactivity. While they dream of Deion, Cameron and Junior running down the alleys, the Reds also appreciate that Sanders is one of the most popular clubhouse figures in their recent history.

  • Albert Belle wrote a letter to Orioles owner Peter Angelos to tell him how focused he is on this season with the promise that Baltimore will get what it expected when Albert signed with them. However, all is not peachy inside The Yard. Angelos reportedly isn't happy with Thrift's signing of Sele, and there could be a showdown over who plays second base. The baseball folks want Jerry Hairston to play second with Delino DeShields serving as a utilityman, but Angelos may order that DeShields play second because of the money he's being paid in the second year of his three-year contract.

  • The Rockies were able to hold out on the Mets request for RHP Jose Jimenez in the Masato Yoshii deal, although there are some clubs that still like young RHP Lariel Gonzalez despite his poor '99 season. Colorado considers LH Josh Kalinowski (11-6, 2.11 at Class A Salem) their best minor league pitching prospect at this point. Colorado is one of several teams interested in Donovan Osborne, but he isn't yet ready to perform a throwing audition, which -- considering he's had more days on the DL than innings pitched in his career -- is a red flag. Healthy, Osborne is a very good pitcher who gets in on right-handed batters as well as anyone this side of Al Leiter.

  • Once they move Cook, the Mets will have rid themselves of $5M in payroll, which, with the Bobby Bonilla buyout scheme, will have them somewhere in the $76M range -- unless they go get another pitcher or deal for a Jim Edmonds-type left-handed bat. Their top three of Leiter, Mike Hampton and Rick Reed is very good, but the depth that allowed Bobby Valentine to so astutely go to a six-man rotation in the dog days is no longer there. The Mets consistently have told other teams that they have two prospects they will not trade under any circumstances this side of A-Rod -- RHP Pat Strange and OF Alex Escobar. ... And the Yankees are telling other clubs that they, too, have to get rid of $5M in payroll as they prepare for their arbitration cases. Good luck.

  • The Players Association is being far more aggressive in monitoring the arbitration cases. "Basically," says one executive, "it's going to be the union against the Commissioner's Office, because they're the two parties involved. The union thought too many agents gave in last year, and this year they're going to try to drive up the prices."

  • The Expos are still looking around for deals with Rondell White and Chris Widger. GM Jim Beattie has been forthright with Mike Barrett and Widger, explaining that he still doesn't know what they will do. If they deal Widger, Barrett will catch. If, say, they deal White to Cleveland for Travis Fryman and Jacob Cruz, then they'll catch Barrett and deal Widger. But if they do not deal for a third baseman, Barrett will play third and Widger will stay. ... Texas will move 1B-DH Mike Simms for payroll purposes. ... The Dodgers are moving Mark Grudzielanek back to second base and will let Jose Vizcaino and surehanded Alex Cora play shortstop. But there are still rumblings that if they do not get off to a good start, GM Kevin Malone is in trouble and that Tommy Lasorda and Bill Guyvette will ascend to the power.

    Closing comments

  • The Cards offered Ricky Bottalico more money than the $1.5M (plus incentives) he accepted from the Royals, but he will get every opportunity to close in Kansas City as he heads for free agency in November. If Bottalico comes back with a big year, the talent-laden Royals could be an interesting team; remember, they blew 30 save opportunities and lost more than 50 games in which they were either tied or ahead from the sixth inning on.

  • Watching the Hall of Fame vote totals for Rich Gossage and Bruce Sutter makes one believe that, other than Dennis Eckersley, no more closers are going to make it for a long while. And Eck is a special case, winning 150 games, throwing a no-hitter, having a 20-win season and starting an All-Star Game before moving to the bullpen and hitting the rare MVP/Cy Young double.

  • One executive predicts "two of the players who'll shoot towards the big leagues quickest this season will be the Twins' (3B) Mike Cuddyer and (SS) Luis Rivas. They're very good, and they're ready to jump." Minnesota already has a terrific young shortstop in Cristian Guzman, but that's not exactly a problem. ... Give Brewers GM Dean Taylor credit. He's picked up a lot of live arms in John Snyder, Jamey Wright, Juan Acevedo and Jimmy Haynes to at least start to rebuild a staff in dire straits.

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     Controversial Braves reliever John Rocker talks with ESPN's Peter Gammons.
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